so i’m sitting here watching my suitemates play Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare 2. this game is great. it’s changed my life quite a bit. ever since it came out, i … i’m just kidding. but this game is serious fun.
i’m 21 years old now. everyone thinks of it as joining the drinking club, but i think it’s more than that. at the risk of sounding pretentious, i think of turning 21 as joining society for real. in all aspects of my life, i’m picking up responsibility and i’m okay with that. i’m growing more confident in my abilities and realizing where i fit into the big jigsaw puzzle of life. in my last post, i talked about goals, ones which i still aim for. however, in this post, i’ll elaborate on the one about not failing college.
i always say things like “i’m a bad student” or “i just don’t like studying.” to an extent, it is true – i’m more of a learn by action rather than reading. recently, i just find myself turned off from computer science more and more. it’s getting harder and i know i’m not putting forth the effort to learn it. i took a silly online myers-briggs personality indicator test and it told me i’m a very organized semi-leader. i thought about this result and realized it’s pretty accurate. i thought about how i chose to stick to majoring in computer science rather than switch into Management of Information Systems (MIS). my brother essentially said “MIS is pussyshit” so i decided to tough it out. i followed my brother into computer science because we both grew up playing with computers, but now i’m starting to see the difference between us. he’s just better at math than i am and compsci fits him more. i can do a good amount of programming, but it’s just not my true strength. i’m not meant to be a straight-up engineer. i should choose something more suitable to my personality so i should switch into MIS. i’m okay with being the compsci dropout. the problem of actually switching is that i only have 3 semesters at BU left. i’d be willing to stay an extra semester if required though. i’m sure i’m not the only one that has had a late revelation like this. this situation will work itself out – my mom says i’m lucky, haha.
i’ve been busy ever since starting college again. i’m trying hard at everything and it’s definitely fun, but i am lacking pure free time – or as i would call it, “slutting around” time. but a friend wanted me to update my blog with my “excellent” writing – HA! – so here goes.
today’s topic of discussion is the broadest possible: life. life is wonderful, life is great, life is what you make of it. all these phrases may be cliche, but i am totally agree with them. perhaps it’s the happiness talking, but i am just overall content with my life. i mean, i live in a pretty select tier of society. i don’t have much to bitch about minus my dreadful homework and stressful tests, but even that is petty. i’m not starving or dying from sickness or worrying about my next rent payment.
so i should just make a list of things that make my day fan-fucking-tastic:
- music – i’m taking a music appreciation class this semester and it’s slowly changing how i view my music. i’m interested enough to possibly pick up an instrument – if i can somehow fit it into my schedule… anyways, music is great. everyone has their own personal collection that they treasure. if you do not, you are missing out on so much. i know that when i accidentally deleted my mp3 collection, i nearly cried. good thing i’m a nerd and i was able to extract my collection back from my iPod. today, i listened to one of my songs [the 5th dimension – aquarius/let the sunshine in] again and it was just SO good through my audio setup. i could hear the 3 different singers positioned apart. i could hear the trumpet on one side and guitars on the other. great sounding music is just so wonderful.
- love – i’m not talking about romantic BF/GF/SO love. just love for your fellow human being in general. life is worth living because of everyone around you. to be honest, my biggest fear is loneliness. if i were to wake up the last person alive on the Earth, i very well might just commit suicide. hanging out with friends, having a family to fall back on, overcoming challenges with fellow classmates, working with great people, meeting other interesting people throughout my daily life – it’s just great.
- change – to observe change is beautiful. i’m pretty sure most normal people will agree that the classic image of the seasons changing is just amazing. like the seasons, i’ve changed dramatically. today at dinner, my suitemates and i talked about childhood. it’s a rather long time ago, but i will never forget all the phases. i used to be a depressed and troubled kid. i battled through bullying and depression – got into a bunch of trouble through all public school years – screwed around in high school classes. then came college and i needed a path in life. my brother had already set a template so i decided to follow him into compsci. even so, the classes aren’t what changed me the most. my work-study job, my internships, my extracurriculars were the catalyst. i saw my future and started getting my act together. i’m still on the path to success (and baller status! haha) so we’ll see where this takes me.
it’s getting late and i should be getting some sleep so i will end this post here. there’s plenty of other things in life to enjoy, but i just wanted to share a little bit of my view on life.